It feels wrong saying it on here, but since no-one reads this I don’t feel too bad about coming clean. I’m being unfaithful. Yes, all of those long years together with my darling wife count for nothing at the moment as I drift lazily into another daydream about my iPad 2. What? Did you think I meant that I’d been chasing ladies (and perhaps even caught one)? Are you mad? Have you met me?
No. I am in week 2# of my continuing love affair with my iPad. Like other cuckolding husbands I have to confess that I know all the reasons for not doing it, but I wanted to, so I did. I mean, look at it. It’s so shiny. And so grateful for apps, sorry...attention.
I know it’s hard to justify Apple products without mentioning how pretty they are, but they’ve managed to make that into a key selling point. They may wrap it up with lots of guff about how it’s better than Windows and that iPhone is better than Android, but not even me, technological dimwit that I am, falls for that. Like a child picking up a new toy, I like shiny. And I am not alone.
You’ve either drunk the Kool-aid, or (like one of my wife’s best friends) think it’s all bollocks and a ripoff, practically kneeling before Satan for an early lunch.
In my defence I took it along to a meeting this week and it saved me backache from carrying folders that are about eight inches thick with documents. It also came to our aid in finding an old document no-one had rememebr to bring along. The curmudgeonliest of the attendees admitted it was a bit more than a “toy”. Which was a relief as, essentially, they paid for it.
What next? I’m waiting for Steve Jobs to decide he needs some more cash so launches the iPhone 5, before I dip my toe again. After that, no doubt I’ll be justifying to myself why the iPad 2 needs upgrading to an iPad 3, as my wife sighs and wishes it was a real life mistress, not a virtual one, so she could get rid of me and take most of our stuff.
Until then, I’ll be keeping my thoughts to myself.
